“Resistance is not only predictable and natural; it is a necessary part of the learning process.” – Peter Bock, Flawless Consulting: A Guide to Getting Your Expertise Used
When it comes to your ideas and beliefs that you hold, it can be challenging to take a step back and see your views clearly. As humans, we feel most at peace when we stay in our comfort zone. When you are around new people, places and are introduced to concepts that seem completely different from your own, you may initially resist accepting these things. Change is something that many people have a challenging time receiving as it requires us to adjust our habits. These routine behaviors and preferences make us feel secure because we know their patterns and how they will inevitably make us feel.
We all face hardships and obstacles in our lives that cause us to be discouraged. We resist negative psychological pain to keep going. It is normal to deny these unfavorable feelings because we believe that it will be better for our mental health in the long term; this is rarely the case. In fact, this suppression of uncomfortable emotions will cause a greater blow back in the end. If you learn to accept how you’re feeling, rather than resisting what makes you uncomfortable, you become free of fear.
Through this learning process, you will gain awareness of how you subconsciously think and feel. To be an individual who is self-aware is a double-edged sword. While you can consciously understand the patterns you display, you may also get invested in analyzing these behaviors. It’s important to focus on the positive change that can take place, rather than drowning in pessimistic introspection. You must be intentional with being a more open-minded person to grow.
Peter Block tells us that, “If things are not going well, I am a player in them not going well. So, I must ask myself, what’s my contribution to the difficulty I am experiencing with the world?” Through this process of self-analyzing, you can uncover your underlying doubts, insecurities, and fears that are holding you back. Effective change for yourself can happen at a more accelerated pace as you are clear on what you are resisting.
According to Psychology Today, you can begin to accept resistance as a good thing when you become aware of your mental and physical state, and the thoughts that accompany this. Try selecting one day out of your week to purposefully check in with how you react to certain things you encounter. If you experience any resistance, choose to relax your body and mind instead. You may take a few deep breaths or focus on a happy thought. Through deliberate practice in understanding your resistance to yourself and others better, you will automatically live a more peaceful life.
Article by Rebecca Crowell
Rebecca Crowell is a Designed Learning intern and graduate of Social Sciences at the University of Central Florida. She is currently pursuing her graduate degree in Clinical Mental Health Counseling at Stetson University in Deland, FL.
